Calling All Verbivores

by Harold Fox

The preceding number of “Calling All Verbivores” (CAV) addressed the subject of buzzwords and highlighted some that were nominated for Anne Fisher’s Mallies—Most Annoying Lingo awards. Reading those nominees reminded me of the parallel awards of the Plain English Campaign for “the most irritating phrases in the English language.”

CAV introduced its readers to the Plain English Campaign (PEC) in the Between the Lines issue of May, 2004, available on the SWO STC Chapter website (archived). That column briefly summarized the history of PEC, including some of its accomplishments, so I shall not repeat that. Rather, let me direct you to that history by quoting myself from that column:

A fuller account of Chrissie Maher and the Plain English Campaign is available on the Campaign’s website (http://www.plainenglish.co.uk/). The story is inspiring, both in Chrissie Maher’s activism and in its affirmation of the importance of words and their clear, helpful use.

That previous column reported the results of the PEC’s survey of 5000 supporters in 70 countries, which found the most irritating phrase in the English language to be “at the end of the day.”

It appears that PEC has not conducted a 2005 survey for the most irritating phrase, but there are some other features that might interest you. Also, I took note of an increase in the number of supporters they now report, 8000, up from 5000, and the number of countries in which those supporters reside, 80, up from 70. PEC offers awards in

• Plain English (the open category)
• Inside Write (for internal government documents)
• Media (for radio, television and newspapers)
• Golden Bulls (for gobbledygook); and
• Foot in Mouth (for a baffling quote by a public figure)
• The Plain English Web Award

One of the 2004 winners for the Golden Bull Awards is the following:

Bank of Scotland for a letter to Scottish Widows and a customer:

We hereby give you notice that Bank of Scotland have retrocessed, reponed and restored Executors and Assignees, in and to their own right and place in the undernoted policy of Assurance by our Office, Videlicet...

The Foot in Mouth category is one that seems to offer sure crowd pleasers.

The 2004 winner was Boris Johnson MP for a comment on a television quiz.

“I could not fail to disagree with you less.”

Just to demonstrate that PEC is not insular or chauvinistic, let’s go back to 2003 and 2002 for winners from this side of the Atlantic.

2003: United States Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld for comments in a press briefing:

“Reports that say that something hasn’t happened are always interesting to me, because as we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns — the ones we don’t know we don’t know.”

2002: Actor Richard Gere who said:

“I know who I am. No one else knows who I am. If I was a giraffe and somebody said I was a snake, I’d think ‘No, actually I am a giraffe’.”

I hope these examples are sufficient to entice you to the PEC website for some browsing. The history of PEC is fascinating, and the effect they have had is inspiring. The payoff for their efforts is illustrated by this Weekly Update item:

Weekly news update: 04 November 2005.

It's official. Plain English makes you seem more intelligent.

According to a new study from Princeton University in New Jersey, writers who use long words needlessly and choose complicated font styles are seen as less intelligent than those who stick with basic vocabulary and plain text.

The author of the study, Dr. Daniel Oppenheimer, based his findings on students’ responses to writing samples that had a varying difficulty of language and design. [Go to the PEC website for the complete item.]

The puzzler from the preceding column is the following from “Ask Marilyn” (Parade, February 27, 2005).

What do the following words have in common:
angel, coal, ear, gun, minute, quiet, pool, sign, tide, tire?
The answer is “When the last two letters of each word are transposed, a new word is formed. Example: angel = angle.”

The puzzler for this column is the following:
It is claimed that only one word in the English language contains the letter combination GNTY. What is it? Hint: You may have read or heard it frequently in the spring/summer of 2004.

Until next time, send me your solutions (or suggestions or complaints or stumpers) at hfox@juno.com or 2005 Burroughs Drive, Dayton, Ohio 45406.